Thursday, May 23, 2013

What I can learn from my tween almost teen

My oldest daughter, Sophia, is not popular in the sense of what society considers popular, but she is sincere and friendly.  Last year, she even remarked that she is not a popular kid, not even close.  She stated that she is what they consider the lowest rung on the popularity ladder.  And while she talked about it, there was not even a hint of sadness in her voice but a smile on her face.  Status does not matter to her, but good friends who have the same hobbies and attitude as her is what she values.  I look at the variety of friends Sophia has and it is amazing!  She has her friends from Chorale and friends from school.  She has other friends from the church youth group and a good friend from her daycare days.  The interest of her friends also varies, some like to sing and act, while others are very good athletes, some prefer to watch a Harry Potter marathon while others prefer High School Musical.  I watch Sophia jump from one group of friends to another at school, never getting caught up in the drama.  If there is drama or a friend is upset with her, she moves on to another group until the argument is over.  As she has gotten older, I have yet to see her come home upset about what somebody has said about her.  Sophia is not the best athlete, but she continues to try sports - even when she comes in last, she still has a smile on her face.
So I am wondering, if my daughter - who is possibly going through the most challenging times in her life - can be so carefree, why can't I?  As adults we want what others have.  We need to be friends with the popular people to elevate our status.  Personally, I am always concerned about what others think about me.  Not only that, but I cannot stand to finish last.  After finishing the Boston Marathon last year, I was embarrassed with my time as I did not hit my goal.  I told my husband he was not allowed to tell anyone my time.  If they wanted to know they had to look it up.
I am thinking that if I start to live for me and stop trying to impress everybody else, life may become a little easier.  I might be able to enjoy life and not feel so stressed all the time.  I think it is humorous that I am learning this lesson from my teenage daughter!  Sophia, I hope that as you grow and mature you continue to live life for you, and know how proud we are for the light you shine into the lives of so many people!



Thursday, May 16, 2013

Moving On and Moving Up!

After 6 years of serving as a monthly parent helper, I had my last day a week ago.  I announced that day to Hannah that I was the Mommy helper that day and this would be my very last "preschool" helper day ever!  I went on to say that I would be a Kindergarten, First grade and Second grade helper but never again a preschool helper.  I am not really the sentimental type.  I cry because I am proud of my children, but I don't generally cry as my children move on and up to their next phase of life or milestone.  When Hannah was a baby and quickly growing up and going from one milestone to the next,  I wouldn't get all teary-eyed that I was losing my baby - I knew it was a fact of life that kids grow.  I never cried as I sent my first child or the next 2 to kindergarten.  I actually felt pretty bad as a I saw the rest of the moms crying and I couldn't squeeze just one tear out.  While I was watching the kids practice the bells for their program that morning the tears came. The more I tried to stop them the faster they came.  This reaction was very puzzling to my daughter as she kept glancing over at me wondering what was happening.  The realization of it all was finally setting in, whether I like it or not, my children are moving on and up in the world!